I still remember the first time I peed my running shorts. When I went out for my first run after I had my first child, I felt freedom; until I sensed the pee breaking free from my betraying bladder. I’m sharing something here that I have barely uttered to anyone. My urinary incontinence journey is not unlike most women yet we don’t talk about it. Saddest part? It stops us from doing movements we want to do. That first time I peed my shorts I was shocked but I didn’t want to stop running. I needed that run for my sanity. So I took off my pullover and wrapped it around my waist to cover my wet-with-pee butt.
I didn’t really know why I lost control of my bladder but I figured my organs were moving around and weren’t back ‘in place’ yet so I didn’t worry too much about it. I still ran occasionally in the first couple of years after that first post partum leakage incident and I was lucky enough that the urinary incontinence went away on it’s own.
Two years later I had a second baby and this time I did some running during pregnancy while pushing the stroller with my 1 year old. We lived in Chicago and I got tons of exercise walking and running while exploring the city. I even ran the Chicago Marathon before my second child was 1 year old! All of this happened with little to no symptoms of urinary incontinence or pelvic floor dysfunction. I’m lucky – not all women are so lucky.
I started working out at the local gym more often to preserve my joints but would still run, especially on weekends. Then it happened again. I was on a 0 dark 30 Saturday run before the family woke up and I leaked. I still didn’t do anything about it other than I started wearing pads when I ran and I slowed down/walked to manage the leakage on runs. Sometimes I peed, sometimes I didn’t. I didn’t see any rhyme or reason to when I leaked but I didn’t feel like I had the time to look into it.
Then we moved to Colorado during the pandemic. I LOVED going for runs but I did other workouts (Peloton – read sitting and no jostling of my bladder) more often just because it fit in my schedule easier but my pelvic floor was not right.
I still leaked and sometimes it was A LOT. I couldn’t ignore it. I’d wear pads often just for daily life since I wanted to be able to run or jump with my kids spontaneously but I didn’t go out for runs much. Then last year I decided to sign up for a 30k trail race. I wasn’t doing it to be fast and I figured that there would be walking involved anyway so my bladder/pee issues were going to be manageable. Training runs = more pads and trying to mitigate hydrating but not peeing in my shorts. I still didn’t do much to try to understand what I could do to help my body NOT pee, I just figured I had to manage the symptom. Did the race and about half way through my bladder let loose to the point I could feel the pee down my leg. Once again, wrapped a pullover around my waist and finally made it to a bathroom to relieve the rest my bladder and change my soaked pad. It was embarrassing and I didn’t tell anyone.
I continued to have incontinence issues but I did start online research as to why this was happening to me. I still have a separation in my abdominal muscles called a diastasis recti which often also occurs with pelvic floor dysfunction. I knew I wasn’t supposed to be doing regular crunches or planks with diastasis recti so I’d just assumed I shouldn’t be doing any core exercises. SO NAÏVE!! Then I found more exercises through my online research (not Kegels – they did not help me at all!) and read about the relationship between my core and pelvic floor weakness, hamstring/glut weakness and mobility. Legs up on a wall ‘windshield wipers’, glut bridges, etc became part of my daily routine. I had no faith in these exercises at first but I actually noticed an improvement! Small improvements made me more curious. I started following numerous physical therapists, specifically pelvic floor specialists, and I learned a ton about my pelvic floor and why it was failing me. It became almost fun to try different exercises I found – everything from back breathing, foam roller bicycles to bear crawls have become daily activities for me. Now I’m proud to say I am mostly symptom free!
If I had to do it over again, I would have said something to a doctor or found a PT to help me with my bladder issues sooner. As women, we have so many things on our plate so just the added thought of finding a professional, going to the appointments, doing the exercises, caused more stress. The irony of ignoring the problem? If I would have spent the time/effort to fix my structure and core strength I could have fixed my issues probably 3+ years ago! The PTs I follow on IG are so knowledgeable. I know my body will continue to change as I age and I don’t intend to give up my activities (including running) so I continue to learn every day. That said, I am ready to seek professional help should I have any relapse of leakage or don’t continue to progress towards healing and strengthening of my core and pelvic floor.
While I’m not really a fan of social media, I do sing high praises for the following women for helping me through my bladder leaks and structural positioning and weakness issues: ourfitfamilylife, deliciouslyfitnhealthy, and anniepilatesphysicaltherapist. Since women can have a variety of reasons for bladder leakage and pelvic floor dysfunction so I urge women to find out what is causing your dysfunction and heal faster. Don’t be embarrassed. You are not alone. You don’t have to share your story but I’m glad I did if I helped you.
